Grief, Bereavement & Mourning

When people think of grief, bereavement, and mourning it's usually related to the death of a friend or loved one. While that's true, it also applies to any significant loss- stuff that most of the time we wouldn’t even realize comes into play. Things like the loss of a relationship, a career we retired from or perhaps ended sooner than expected, or maybe even a "normal life" (whatever you define ‘normal’ as). All of those examples can cause us to think about good and bad memories, events leading up to the loss, regrets and things we could have/should have done differently (the familiar "What if?"), concerns about the present or future, and more. While we're on this emotional roller coaster we’re wondering where we fit in, we can lose our identity or sense of purpose in life, or even worry about how people see us as someone who’s reliable or has some kind of wisdom to offer. We can feel shaken to the very foundation of who we thought we were or how others did- it’s a scary thought for sure. It's a combination of a lot of emotions like anger, anxiety or depression, or even emotional numbness to the whole situation and with those around you. It can be physical as well- things like:

-Trouble sleeping (too much or too little sleep)

- Weight gain or loss

- Body aches and pains

- Stress can compromise your immune system- which means you can get sick easier (cold, flu, etc) 

- Digestion issues/loss of appetite

- Aggravated pre-existing chronic pain issues like migraines or back pain

Struggling with grief, bereavement and mourning effects different people in different ways. If I can say one thing you take away from reading this I hope it’s this- whatever your reaction is, it’s normal. I know people in our lives often mean well when they dispense advice but sometimes it ends up being hurtful and we feel misunderstood. Advice and even judgement, as in the case of a death- “How DARE she/he smile and laugh! Person Y just passed away [insert random length of time here]!!” Like I said up top- it’s not only about the loss of a person because of a death. That’s where many of us struggle because we don’t think any other significant loss in life is related to grief, bereavement, and mourning in even the most remote way. That’s why this issue is so hard to deal with- if you don’t know the “why?” or even know it's an issue then how can you be expected to figure out how to deal with it? With that uncertainty comes confusion, feeling overwhelmed or feeling unable to cope with "everyday stuff", and more. It’s like being in a dark tunnel with no light at the end. We don’t know which way is up, or left or right, or is the way out.

If you're grieving the loss of someone or something, I have specialized training so we can work together on those experiences and feelings. Give me a shout, I would love to help out. (No- I didn’t make that rhyme intentionally!)